The Foreshadow


You can’t turn the tide

We often attempt to gain some form of self value by believing  we are unique, the first of our kind to have walked our path and thought are thoughts.

But under some light scrutiny, you often find that this hypothesis is somewhat inaccurate. and at times depressing.

But what makes us consider this assumption in the first place, is it the way we go about living our lives?

Or is it the inevitable motivations behind our life choices?

Do we even have true control of those motivations?

We are brought up in the fundamental belief of cause and effect.

Breaking it down to its lowest common denominator, there are two real choices we are faced with.

Monkey sees and monkey does, and enjoys

which in times is great and you lead a life that is filled with continual positive reinforcement and joy with your actions

Or

Monkey sees,  doesn’t like and avoids

And you build your life forward making sure you don’t have to go through such discomforts again.

But then the latter happens in abundance, when you have more of the avoidance in your nature than the acceptance.

Instead of living a life you want, you end up making judgements based on the life you don’t want.

And while on paper that may seem to be the same thing, in reality these two campaigns are completely different.

Not wanting a starter doesn’t necessarily mean you can have your cake and eat it.

But what’s worse is that you notice the people  that came before you also started on the same avoidance path of you, and somehow meandered down the very same path you didn’t want to take.

How can so many people with the

It is inevitable Mr Anderson…

I’ve been noticing something. I would meet someone who has dated a certain type of person before. A type that on paper may be the reason why they were attracted to me in the first place. And they will discuss this ex and how their relationship was the worst thing ever and what ultimately they did to them. Not always pleasant hearing but eventually, with time you come to adapt to that situation, when altered in different guises, languages and dialects. Interpreting the mental and physical scars born by being bound to a monster is probably my native tongue in all honesty.

and something immediately starts to tinker in your head.

When will I finally become someone’s horrible ex?

And this type isn’t unique to one specific thing or characteristic trait. It’s spread over literally everything.

It happens at work as well, when a type is based on an occupational lifestyle. In my office, getting a divorce is like filing for a tax return. Broken marriages are the norm and many a long bitter discussion with a spouse over the phone can be heard by our technical and managerial staff as they exit meetings to discuss divorce proceedings. It’s really kinda grim.

And then I wonder, how long till I become someone’s ex spouse or even sooner, their new young thing on the side to parade at work functions to their friends to show they are ‘coping in crisis’.

And forevermore what frightens me is that somewhere along the line, I’ve already crossed some of these lines and I’ve yet to notice them.

When you spend everyday looking for minute differences to the turn, you can become oblivious of the turn altogether, before you know it a stranger is staring back at you and you wonder how on earth you let it get this bad, especially when you knew about it and had time to prepare.

Or are we all ticking time bombs, preordained to take our assigned roles in life, whether we want them or not.

Every hero does indeed need a villain. But what does every villain need?

Certainly not to stare at a clock and avoid their destiny. The show must go on as they always say.

Perhaps they need to highlight the code, the string of algebraic functions which dictate or highlight their prime directive and de-activate the bomb before it goes postal. But that wouldn’t make a great story would it, probably a direct to dvd and a late night showing on channel 5 after some soft porn.

By the by, wasn’t every villain initially just born out of innocence, perhaps a victim of another villain’s actions. While some people die as complete monsters, they certainly aren’t all born that way.

Because the greatest irony of life is that we hurt those around us the most when we are utmost trying to protect them.

And perhaps the greatest villains of all are the heroes who are too engulfed in their own battles to realise those close to them are falling off the path.

I don’t know,

Time to sign on the dotted line

I painted a scenario of life acceptance for myself and placed markers above it to judge my life’s impact rather than my own self indulgent ability to enjoy it but as time go by, monitoring people on similar wavelengths than me, it seems all i

Ican ever bring it doom and gloom

Maybe it’s time to just accept it

I’m an asshole in waiting. I’m a slave to fate, I guess i should stop wasting time and get on with it.

Or maybe that’s just the test to circumvent.

I’m forever with the doubt as it jades my ability to scout.

The worst thing about this post is that it has probably crossed your mind at some point in time as well

But I guess that’s one of the better things about it.

Maybe this is something we can all share  the same woes together.

Being unique isn’t always everything.

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