I’m Ron Burgendy and Ladies and Gentleman, this news report will liteally change your life


Dr Bishop of the institute of funding unique characteristic kinetics via Altered light luminence (AKA the department of FUCK-ALL) has made a remarkable breakthrough in his field

he had managed to actually quantify a human orgasm and observe it under a microscope for everyone to see.

This is the first time any emotion has been viewed under a microscope and 5the reason he chose an orgasm wasn’t purely because that’s the best tag his blog has at the moment, but because the orgasm is the strongest stable emotion to measure in a scientific field. Although some what rare with female subjects (some claim the female orgasm is a myth altogether), it seems to be readily repeatable with adolescent male subjects.

So he gathered the subjects in a controlled environment and got his video camera and magnifying lens (and safety glasses out and caught a glimpse of the inside of a sperm cell just as it leaves the tip of th frenulum (That is the scientific term for bell end for you and I at home).

this is a video of what he first observed

here are a few words from the nobel prize nominated scientist

‘This was very close to my hypothesis but in a test situation, we actually thought the ejaculate of a male homo sapien looked like the training montage of rocky IV. Further studies must be done to determine where these deviations are.

Further work conducted in this area has been done and early suggestions  predict the ejaculate of a homosexual man under a microscope looks a lil like this, although results are inconclusive as this is how said doctor’s ejaculate looks like :-/

anyway this work is a team effort and I appreciate all the helping hands involved, I wouldn’t have come this far without them’

Thanks Dr Bishop…

and now the weather…Looks like its raining training montages tonight jim…

I’m ron burgundey and from everyone on the newsroom, Stay classy Dan Diego